Feeling like a Mama Fail. And it’s totally stupid.

An article was linked on Facebook yesterday by another blogger (The Feminist Breeder, I think?) about picky eating children. You can go read it here.

Basically, it says that one of the ways mothers can ensure that their children avoid “the typical toddler ‘beige carbohydrate‘ preference, such as white breads, white rice, salt, and sugars” is by exposing them to different flavors while breastfeeding. Which is where my Failboat is coming home to port.

Joshua is an incredibly picky eater. I had to eat a restricted diet while breastfeeding him because of his milk allergy and then, when I couldn’t exclusively pump any longer and keep up with his demands, we switched to formula.

So now? I’m blaming myself for his picky eating.

I mean, it makes sense, right? (Yes. It does. And no. It doesn’t.)

And then there were all those veggies I pureed that he wouldn’t eat. Was it because I didn’t add seasonings? Should I have continued to push the issue on the meats and a wider variety of vegetables? Should I have started with tiny table foods instead of purees and done things differently?

I can’t change it now, but I sure am beating myself up over the woulda-coulda-shouldas.

Meal times are such an ordeal with him. His diet consists of cheese, peanut butter, Goldfish, bananas, a bite or two of apple, Gerber Veggie Dip puffs, French fries ( ::sadface::) and occasionally bread or tortillas. He will not eat a single meat. The ONLY protein he gets comes from peanut butter. His diet is pretty beige.

In fact, his diet is EXACTLY the kind of diet this article’s talking about as being bad for kids. And it’s the only diet my kid will eat.

He won’t even pick new foods up and try them. Won’t even push them around on his tray. He’ll scream and cry until we remove the offending food and I can’t just listen to him scream and cry because then I want to scream and cry and that’s just not good for either of us.

This is all compounded by the fact that it’s nearly impossible for me to work all day, go to the gym in the afternoons, and get home with him in a time-frame that makes it reasonable for me to get dinner on the table so that we can try to feed him whatever it is we’re having. I can either go to the gym and not make it home with enough time for us to actually sit down to a family meal or not go to the gym after work.

Tonight we had a near meltdown because he had some veggie puffs and wanted more. Only I didn’t want to give him more because, despite the fact that the word “veggie” is in the title, they’re basically junk food and he hadn’t had anything of substance yet. But there are calories in them and the kid won’t survive on ice. Which is something he loves.

Ugh. I just want to cry.

I’m pretty freaking terrified that he’s going to be unhealthy because he won’t eat anything. Like I’m a huge screw-up as his mother because he hates food.

Have you had picky eaters who grew up to be good eaters? What did you do?

Am I doomed to always have a picky eater?

Am I just being irrational and ridiculous?

Help.